Baggage Claim

Trash day at our house is on Mondays.  This week, we remembered around 6:00 am Monday Morning that we did not put it out the night before.  I knew it was potentially too late, yet gathered the trash anyway and put it out.  We were too late.  And as I saw our already full trashcan leaving this morning, I groaned at the thought of how greatly it will be overflowing by Sunday night.  Then I kept thinking about it and ultimately its connection to the Lord. Why I linger on such useless thoughts I cannot answer and yes-- it's totally cool to find cheesy connections of how the Lord can fit in our everyday.  And no, not in a pantheistic sort of way-- (I learned that word in class this morning, hopefully I did not butcher its usage).  No judgement if you have to dictionary.com it.  I did.

Anyway, I don't know about you, but this was not the first time forgetting to take out the garbage has happened at this house.  It honestly would not be so bad except for the fact that it has another week to build, and smell.  All around, g-ross.  But seriously, on a personal note, how often do we ignore the need to take out our own garbage?  And by that, I'm referring to personal garbage.  No matter who you are, we all have our own baggage-- someone makes us angry, we don't agree with something someone said, we are hurt by how someone has treated us, we wrong someone and try to get away with it..  Our own brokenness and the brokenness the world brings leaves us carrying around more weight than we ought--daily.  Yet, for some reason, we lean towards the scale of holding onto it, of not taking it out, of not letting it go.

I did not realize it early this morning, but these connections only set me up for some conversation I was able to have with a new friend this afternoon.  I love when the Lord works in this way.  The two totally lined up.  This friend gave me an article by Tim Keller, called All of Life is Repentance.  A must read.  She (being a little older than I am) noticed how she read it and viewed it when she was my age, and how her views and thoughts toward the concept have changed.  Over the past week I read through it and today we were able to hang out and talk about it (and life) for a little while.  For the record, this article only reiterated the needed work in my soul.  It was honestly comical how where I am with this concept now, lines up so well with where she was when she was my age.  When talking about repentance-- I like to think I repent, that I come to God, whole-heartedly, asking for forgiveness.  That I come to him, bringing him my brokenness, and seeking his unfailing love even when I have failed him most.  But, really, do I? What do my relationships with others look like that I do?  If you're like me, your first thought is what do my relationships with others have to do with MY repentance with GOD??

"Consider how the Gospel affects and transforms the act of repentance."

I really urge you to read the article for yourself--I absolutely will not do justice to Tim Keller's words here.  http://download.redeemer.com/pdf/learn/resources/All_of_Life_Is_Repentance-Keller.pdf

Bringing my baggage and bringing my garbage whole-heartedly to the Lord, is only done best when I am deeply surrounding myself with others.  And check out this downfall effect of a lack of relationship-- I can live in a house of girls and easily not share my garbage with them.  If they don't know what I am dealing with (my struggles, my sins, my downfalls), then I have a free card to keep it to myself, all bottled up inside.  And with that, who's to say whether I am living 'a Life of Repentance.'  In this sense, repentance is a breeze.  It's easy if all of my relationships are surface-- if I wrong someone, it may be weeks until I see them again and then the matter was probably not even big enough to be a big deal anymore.  You forgive them, they forgive you, you briefly ask God to forgive you, you're good.

Yet-- a Life of Repentance centered around the Gospel is hard.  In the good-way-kind of hard.  It challenges you, and pushes you to lean into the way of Lord in a way that you have not before.  It pushes you to be intentional with others in a way that you have not before.  And, I am no expert, I am only on the brink of beginning to learn what that really means.  For my friend, it's going to evidence itself often in her relationship with her husband.  For myself, it is going to depend on the relationships I seek to become more deeply invested in, in the places I allow others to really know me, inside and out.  Where can I include others to be a part of my life where my sin is made known?  Where do I hide my struggles and dealings to allow an easy escape in my relationship with God?  In what ways do I need to seek out and invest in relationships to not only be more deeply known myself..But also to be able to come more deeply to God-- May you and I not feel like we have to seek His forgiveness so we can  check off that we took it out to the street, but that we may come to him knowing that because He died on the cross for our sins, we can come to him and simply receive his love and his mercy.

I pray that these thoughts are a blessing and challenge for you as they were for me.  I pray that I daily seek to find the Lord in the small things.  And today am thankful for not putting the garbage out on time.

Side Notes:
All of Life is Repentance By Tim Keller

This blog title goes out to the most special, David Todd and Jen Fowler, who truly know my deep love for anything country and especially Miranda Lamberts "Baggage Claim" And though it is SO opposite the message of this blog, here it is for you anyway--
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1M7pCS6Jpho

A Fall Weekend

Welp.  Here's to a first blog post.  I honestly laugh at myself for starting one of these things (so yes, I will laugh with you).. I've never thought of myself as much of a blogger, because let's be honest, people are really not that interested in what I'm doing in the day-to-day, yet I have some odd desire to do this anyway..  Really, this is all selfish-gain.  I am excited about it and want to do it as a way for me to look back.  I am in that crazy transition of life you call the early 20's and I want a way to look back on it all-- to look back on what I am doing, what I am learning and where I am going.  I have graduated, am living in a new town, and am in the midst of making decisions that will affect the rest of my life.  My prayer for it all is that His will be done.

For now, I got to spend the weekend at home.  And. It. Was. The. Best.  Having graduated from college, I have come to experience a new appreciation and longing for home I did not before.  I look forward to the time I get to spend with my family, and have been looking forward to such a relaxing weekend with them since I moved to Greenville.  My parents live out in the middle of nowhere, right before a small town called Starr-Iva on the outskirts of Anderson.  A less than five minute drive from the Hartwell Dam, we spent our Saturday afternoon on a walk across the dam.  I went for a run and then met them at the bridge to hang out, relax and enjoy the view.  You have Hartwell lake on one side and the Savannah River on the other.  My mom commented, "it's views like this I just don't understand how anyone could not believe there is a God."  I couldn't agree with her more.

The weather this weekend was absolutely perfect.  My run felt like I was in the best shape of my life with how perfect the air was...I realize many cannot connect with a love for running, but I can often feel so rejuvenated and inspired by it.. I really do consider it a way to worship for myself.  One of my favorite parts about running are the people you pass along the way.  This gentleman and his wife were the friendliest.  And yes, I am a creep and pretended like I was getting a shot of the water before he passed..

I couldn't get over this view of the river.  I remember once in high school where a friend brought a few of us out here late at night to see the view at night time... I had no appreciation for it then.  I could have sat in this spot all day.  The trees were all sorts of reds, yellows and oranges, and you could see for miles. 

My parents.  They are gems and a half.  I can't get enough of the time I am able to spend with them. 

To weekends at home, I thank you for the rest you bring.